Thursday, November 5, 2009

another week

We are in the middle of an unusual week - several appointments in three different cities. So far, we've been to Hamilton for the pediatrician, TO for sleep assessment (do you call them sleep doctors?), and Kitchener for vision follow-up. We also had a phone conversation with genetics at Sick Kids, and we will be visiting them in TO at the end of the month. We are currently investigating the possibility of a growth-hormone deficiency in both girls. Tomorrow is another appointment at Mac in Hamilton. We are learning new things about both Rachel and Janneke, and we are blessed with patient doctors who took a lot of time to meet with us. Interestingly enough, the first thing our pediatrician asked about was me - How are you coping? he asked.

Good question. This past week, the dragon of overwhelmedness came and I couldn't find my sword to slay it. When your confidence and strength breaks down, when you feel as if you are suffocating, it's quite probable your body is saying ENOUGH. And so my body spoke. Ralph was able to take some time off work so he could help me out. Without going into the rest of the details, I'll simply say it's interesting how those lowest of the low moments are actually good for you, causing to review what is truly important. Frustrating how those same moments shake you to your core and make you feel vulnerable and even ashamed.

Yet, blessings continue to abound. Though we were managing with our own meals, the week that everything came undone, we received over twelve meals (for freezer too) from four lovely women. Carolyn came along to the appointments when Ralph could not. Neighbour Nancy has been furiously raking our leaves, for which we are grateful, and neighbour Mark was willing to stop by last night when we had some concerns about our van. We know that God continues to work through His people.

Rachel's stander arrived last week, and she is loving the upright position. I wheeled her to the piano for the first time in the stander, and her hands immediately extended out to play the keys. She absolutely loves being a "big kid". We are so thankful for her joy-filled disposition, giving everyone smiles as we go from appointment to appointment.

Janneke is improving health-wise, and she is opening her eyes wider now. I say that because her eyes are not big to begin with, and her actual smile has yet to come. Instead, I feel like she is communicating through her eyes, and in the last few days, she's been trying to "say" a lot.

We have started work on our therapy room. It already has a ball "pit" - a wading pool full of small balls that all four girls love. It is a crazy toy to put in your home, but it provides an unique sensory experience for Rachel and Janneke. (Thanks for the idea, Bernice.) Now Em and Soph have to quit the target practice on each other with the balls... : )

Thanks for your warm fuzzies and prayers. I think most of us to some degree would like to think we have "it" together, but truthfully, aren't there times when that is far from the truth? Perhaps the more we are honest with each other, the more we can also trust each other and encourage each other as we move along this journey of life.




Anonymous said...

Once again, Sara, thank you so much for your honesty. And yes, you are so right when you say we don't have it all together! We can be so thankful that we don't "do" each day on our own. I'm sure our heavenly Father is blessed when we acknowlegdge that and call on Him for His mercy and grace!

We lift you up in prayer each day,

The Van Hulzens said...

I see that your traffic feed says that I am in Rochester, NY. Hmmmm...I'm sitting at Elianna's gymnastics practice in Apple Valley...

I was feeling a little overwhelmed this week too...but only by mundane things like going to work, driving the kids to practices, driving a forgotten lunch to school and more work. I'm glad you are feeling not so overwhelmed anymore :-)!!


MM said...

I am learning that "having it together" is a fleeting experience for any of us. Thank you for your honesty, only when more of us are brave enough to do that can we behave like real community. So glad you are blessed with community on so many sides, including however Ralph was able to step in when your body said 'enough'.

Thank you for the lesson of seeing the blessings.


nelly w. said...

am reading a book by thomas moore entitled "Dark Nights of the Soul". It's got good stuff in it. Sometimes the overwhelming sadness and weariness can put you in a place where there is a time for rebuilding and re-energizing and possibly transformation. You mention that, too. There seems to be a pattern in living one's life: light and dark, happy and sad, the vitalizing and deadening. The writer calls these episodes "a mystery that is as natural as the sun and the moon, day and night, and summer and winter."
Let us know if you need help with driving? If we are home we have time.

Delaney said...

Prayers will continue! Oh I wish I could send over a meal or help in some other way! We love you guys. Thank you for the honest updates, we need the reminders of how to pray (and help!).

Love, Del

superstarmom said...

I'm SO glad the ball pit is a hit :) My kids all love it too. I also love the picture of Rachel playing the piano. Perhaps she'll have to play me a song soon.

I was thinking about you this past weekend and pray that you will soon be able to experience some Sara-time too. Maybe we'll have to go away together :)

Anonymous said...

Sara and Ralph,

I stumbled upon your blog today after doing some cleaning - I found some old Fiddler on the Roof programs and pictures from Calvin Christian School and got to thinking about you. I will keep your beautiful family in my prayers.

Jeanette (Kinney) Potvin
PS. Ha! Our surnames are now right by each other in the alphabet!